As my daughter and I bumped into each other recently in the kitchen, I found myself reflecting on this season of unexpected blessings. Don’t get me wrong—my life is busy, stressful, and chaotic. At the same time, I am seeing things that I didn’t anticipate, especially after the death of our son.
She and I sort of cooked dinner while trying to unload the dishwasher and keep the kitchen clean as we went, but we kept getting distracted as we shared pictures of bathtubs and room layouts. As we dreamed together about our future homes, I found myself enjoying every minute of it.
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change. James 1:17 (ESV)
My circumstances have changed in ways I never imagined, yet the character of the One who gives good gifts has not. I know that the Lord is good. In those early days of grief, I struggled to see His goodness. After losing our son, I couldn’t imagine a future in which I would experience joy again. And yet, here I am. Do I still miss him? Every single day. Learning to live with grief and joy existing together has been hard. Neither one denies the other.
The future I once imagined looks nothing like the life I’m living today. And there is still so much beauty to enjoy and so much goodness to anticipate. The sweet snuggles with my grandbabies, cooking with my daughter, morning coffee with my husband, and laughter at the dinner table. I don’t take those moments for granted.
We did finally get the dishwasher unloaded just before we sat down to eat. More importantly, we analyzed bathtubs, furniture layouts, and the benefits of hidden pantries. And we got to do it together.