Michael and I recently attended a retreat for bereaved parents. Before Joshua died, I couldn’t imagine attending something that sounded so depressing. In fact, most people would expect that such a weekend would be miserable. It is far from it. Is it a difficult weekend? Yes. Even somewhat awkward at least for the first few minutes. And then, we start talking about our children.
We laugh, we cry, we have conversations that are encouraging and uplifting. We have deep conversations about God, faith and Heaven. We share our struggles and our triumphs. Although we each grieve differently, we share the same pain.
This weekend, I heard one of the most beautiful statements. Carrie Evins, another waiting mom, shared with us a quote from Steve Swift.
“He cried. He knew Lazarus was dead before He got the news. But still, He cried. He knew Lazarus would be alive again in moments. But still, He cried. He knew this world is not home. He knew death here is not forever. He knew eternity and the Kingdom better than anyone else could. And He wept. Because this world is full of pain and regret and loss and depression and devastation. He wept because knowing the end of the story doesn’t mean you can’t cry at the sad parts.”
Read that last line again: “Knowing the end of the story doesn’t mean you can’t cry at the sad parts.”
I know the end of the story. I will see Joshua again, and I am going to continue to cry at the sad parts, even almost seven years later. We know that he is safely tucked away in Heaven, and we know that someday we will join him. Until then, there will be days that are just harder than others. There will be days that his absence is even more noticeable.
It is hard to watch people hurting; even more so when we know there is nothing that we can do to ease the pain or fix the situation. Sometimes people want to avoid any mention of someone who has moved on to Heaven. If you know a parent waiting to be reunited with a child in Heaven, please say their child’s name to them. They might cry. It’s okay. That doesn’t mean they have lost hope. Jesus wept during the sad parts and it’s okay if we do too.
With Eyes on the Cross 