Walking the Same Path

I remember the very first “While We’re Waiting Mom’s Day” that I attended after Joshua died. I pulled into the driveway, parked my car and sat there for a minute trying to decide if I would stay or just pull away. What had possessed me to sign up to go and spend a day with eight women I had never met?

They knew my pain. We share the experience of losing a child. They were walking the same path that I was walking and some of them were further along than I was. Surely I could learn something.

The sweet woman who opened the door, greeted me and when I told her my name, she hugged me tight and said, “I prayed hard for you when your sweet Joshua died.” She had heard of him. Her kids were in school with him. She spoke his name. Just a month after our loss, her precious little girl joined him in Heaven, and she too became a grieving mom. 

In just a couple of hours, six women will arrive at my home for their first Mom’s Day. My heart aches for them this morning. It aches for the pain they are facing and for the inner turmoil some of them will fight before they arrive.

One of the first things that we will talk about is the great courage it takes to drive yourself to someone’s home you have never met, to spend the day with women you do not know, and to talk about the worst thing that has ever happened to you. I am so grateful to the founders of While We’re Waiting for recognizing this and for making it a part of the introduction to today’s retreat.

They know, because they are also walking this path. 

Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2

They exemplify this scripture each and every time they open their hearts to grieving parents. It isn’t by accident that God’s word tells us to “bear one another’s burdens.”

What a blessing this group has been to my husband and me. It sounds crazy, but we jump on every chance we can to spend time with other parents. They get us. They know things that would be impossible for those who have not lost a child to know. (Things I wish no other parent on this planet would ever have to know.)

When we first started spending time with other parents, we found hope. They were like normal people. (I didn’t feel normal at all.) They laughed. They joked about sports teams. But, more importantly, we had deep conversations about our pain and child loss. There wasn’t a topic they wouldn’t discuss or question they wouldn’t answer. They talked about the goodness of God during their toughest days. They talked about His faithfulness in their lives. They talked about how God is good in the midst of the most excruciating pain.

They reminded me of the promise of eternity and helped me find joy while I wait to be reunited with those I love in Heaven.

God knew the value in His children coming together, to walk arm in arm, as they faced storms here on Earth. He knew that we could offer one another hope, encouragement, kindness and compassion, especially if it was a storm we had already been through.

I pray that whatever burden you are carrying, you can find someone who has already carried it and will walk with you. 

I pray that whatever burden you have already carried, you will ask God to lead you to those who need help carrying that burden now. You don’t have to have all of the answers. Just a heart to show others the goodness of God in the midst of your pain. You will never know the hope that you will bring.